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Another Week (Weeks 6 and 4)

Time seems to really drag lately. I have officially hit the four week mark since surgery on the second (right) knee. Physical therapy goes extremely slow with it. The first/left knee is much better, but everything seems to have been worse and slower with the second surgery.

One might think it funny that having this time off should be grand, but nothing can be further from the truth. I am sick of being in pain and the slightest stretch or bump can send me into tears and shrieks. I am sick to death of watching television and movies and even attempting to do anything that interests me – ie all of my old hobbies – is almost impossible to attempt. Going upstairs has me exhausted before I even hit the top step, so I end up sitting in my sewing room watching tv while I recoup, and then it takes everything out of me to go back downstairs.

On occasion, I actually go something, it seems so pathetic the task. I was able to hobble out to the garage and get the necessary supplies and tools to re-pot a couple of plants. That was the highlight and the summary of my day yesterday.

Don’t get me started on physical therapy. I swear it is such a scam… there isn’t anything I am doing there that I can’t (and am often doing) at home. I’ve been to two weeks of it and I don’t seem to be doing any better by going. I can say that the one thing is does motivate me to do is shower… God knows I wouldn’t want to go to this place stinking… and I suppose I should be grateful for that. I don’t see much reason for going to all the trouble of showering just to be sitting and laying around the house.

I see my ortho doc on Monday, I am a bit anxious as to what he is going to tell me about my progress. I just don’t see this getting better at a acceptable rate. At least to me. He keeps telling me – as do most of the health professionals I see – that I have to keep in mind that I just had to major surgeries and that it takes time to recover. It seems a different song than the one sang before surgery… I remember him talking about being able to go back to work in four to six weeks post surgery. But here I am at that point, and I couldn’t imagine trying to be at work for eight hours a day, let alone the commute and getting ready. And I haven’t even been cleared to drive yet either.

I keep trying to be positive, but I am finding this the most difficult part of the recovery. I’ve never been one to have regrets, and not to be redundant, but this is one thing I would not do again if I actually had the chance. I hope I can be made to see that this thinking is wrong somewhere in the future. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

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