My Blog

Join me in figuring out "what now?"

Queen, a Toyota Corolla and Love

on 30 June, 2015

It has been a reflective kind of day, so far. I think it is all triggered by the fact that my baby turns 20 today. My “baby”! I’ve been thinking about what his life has been and what it will be in the future. Have I done the right things? Have I done a good enough job? Will he be the courteous, adventurous, kind man that I always hoped he would be?

But on the heels of all of that, I was thinking about music. And history. My history. How so very important music is and the role it plays in my heart and mind. Who and what songs remind me of and make me start ruminating. And I was trying a little challenge to think of songs and what they have meant to me. Or how they were connected to my history. I was trying to think way back… what is the oldest song and most poignant piece of music and how did it move me?

And just about that time, a very special song played. One that floods my heart and my memories. Let me see if I can do it justice.

Sitting in a little orange Toyota Corolla, parked along some dusty, unused farm road, sometime in the summer of 1976, I believe. Holding hands with a very special boy and listening to music; desperately trying to figure out what we were supposed to be doing with our emotions and hormones. And “Queen” comes on the radio (or was it on an 8 track tape?) and we both know the lyrics and we sing along. Until we get to that point where they sing “I really love you…  you’re my best friend”. And when we sang it, we looked into each others’ eyes and we both knew we were saying “I love you” for the very first time.

God, it was frightening and exuberant and wonderful and I thought that my heart just might spring from my chest, it was beating so hard. I think we both passed a certain stage where we weren’t quite adults yet, but we were no longer a boy and a girl. God, I will never forget how amazing I felt for those minutes. And I knew that he really did love me!

I still think of that moment in time. Bringing me right back to that tempest of the emotions and not knowing what to do with all the feelings inside. I was just 16 and he was a year older, but then I believed with every fiber of my being that this was the person I wanted spend my whole life with.

Of course, I didn’t. Not even really sure how much longer we lasted as a couple. I won’t embarrass him by putting his name in here, but I know that he remembers too. Maybe not this particular moment, but we did have some good times. And some not-so-good times. Life moved on for both of us, but I have never lost this moment.



One response to “Queen, a Toyota Corolla and Love

  1. Yes I totally get it and been writing about very similar stuff myself. My “baby” also turned 20 last birthday and just don’t know where the time has gone – been so busy and now looked up to find myself middle- aged! Happy memories of the summer of 76.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: